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Mediation can be a powerful tool for families to resolve conflicts and make decisions collaboratively. It allows all parties to communicate openly in a structured environment, with the help of a neutral third-party mediator. This approach often leads to more amicable and sustainable agreements compared to litigation, especially in matters involving custody, parenting plans, or division of assets. It can also save time and money while reducing stress for everyone involved. 

Do you know what to ask for in child custody mediation?

This legal process is key to creating a balanced and child-focused custody agreement that covers critical elements that will affect the lives of children and parents for years to come.

In this guide, we will discuss what to ask for in mediation, including legal custody arrangements, parenting plans, child support, special considerations for children, and other important issues. 

Core Aspects of Child Custody to Address

Man and woman arguing with a mediator

While each case has its specific circumstances, fundamental aspects of child custody cases need to be addressed in mediation for all families.

Where will the child primarily live? How will the family handle timesharing? Who makes the major decisions regarding important aspects of the child’s life? These questions highlight some major considerations when a parent is trying to determine what to ask for in child custody mediation. 

In mediation, parents will discuss a wide range of considerations necessary to foster a supportive environment for their children after divorce or separation.

When approaching these arrangements, the parents should agree to have the child’s best interests at heart. In order to do this, the parents should discuss living situations, the capability to provide what the child needs physically, emotionally, and financially, the rigors of each parent’s job and work schedule, the child’s educational needs, and other particulars of family life. 

Crafting a Parenting Plan 

Another key area of discussion regarding child custody is the parenting plan. The parenting plan will delineate how time sharing will work for the child(ren). It also serves to hold the parents accountable. If one parent does not abide by the plan, the other one has an avenue for recourse. 

A detailed plan should be crafted to ensure stability and clarity and help prevent misunderstandings. A solid and comprehensive plan facilitates a healthy quality of life for children and parents alike.

Subjects that should be discussed and determined include living arrangements, visitation schedules, holiday splits, and transportation. It is advised to approach the parenting plan with flexibility. 

Here are a few tips:

Be willing to swap holidays and birthdays. These important days are meaningful to both parents and children. 

Be understanding of each parent’s work schedule regarding vacations, summer camps, and school holidays. 

Understand schedule modifications may need to be made if a parent or child is sick. Do you want to decide on “make-up” days? Unexpected events will occur. 

Consider the best way to handle transitions (picking up and dropping off the child). Sometimes, a neutral location works better for this. 

Other subjects that may be a good idea to discuss include how you will discipline the child to maintain consistency in both households, whether or not parents will be sharing photos or videos of the child on social media, and if/how you will communicate about the child’s whereabouts when they are with the other parent (such as when they are traveling out of the city or state). 

Creating a flexible yet comprehensive plan is best to accommodate the child’s needs and the parents’ schedules. 

Negotiating Child Support and Financial Responsibilities 

After a separation or divorce, ensuring that the child’s financial needs are adequately met is especially important. 

Child support does just that. It provides for essential daily living expenses, such as food and clothing, and it also helps to pay for health insurance and education costs, as well as extracurricular activities, such as participation in sports teams, Boy Scouts or Girl Scouts, music lessons, or other interests of the child. 

The state has general guidelines involving the calculation of child support. The factors that are typically taken into account include:

The income of both parents

The child’s standard needs

The amount of time each parent has with the child

The costs of childcare

The costs of healthcare

Any special considerations

While Florida has a child support guidelines chart, there is some room for negotiation when you are in mediation. 

Child support negotiations often involve the child’s needs and previous standard of living prior to the separation or divorce. If the child has a certain standard of living, maintaining that standard of living is generally considered appropriate after a separation or divorce. 

Utilize an attorney’s expertise during mediation, particularly if you are unsure of what to ask for in child custody mediation regarding child support. They can help you how to win child custody mediation negotiations.

Approach the issue of financial responsibility with the intention of supporting the child’s health and well-being for the long term. 

Special Considerations for the Child’s Welfare 

It is not uncommon to have special considerations for your child’s health and welfare. These should also be part of the negotiations, which could include but are not limited to:

Having a child with special needs — certain occupational or developmental programs, healthcare providers and services, or other needs

Educational preferences — choosing a particular educational institution or deciding to home-school 

Religious upbringing — deciding a particular religion for the child.

Various issues could require special consideration depending on the particular circumstances. Consider the child’s potential needs not only in the short term but also in the long term. As the child grows, different needs arise.

Special considerations should be approached with care and openness. Since they can be sensitive, very personal, and perhaps contentious, parents should be respectful and listen with an open mind to make decisions that cater to the child’s overall welfare. 

Effective Strategies for Mediation Involving Child Custody

First, the child’s interests must be at the center of all decision-making. Then, it takes effective strategies when you come to the mediation table. Here are some recommendations on how to prepare for and engage in mediation effectively:

Collect, organize, and bring important documentation — any related court papers (custody petition, divorce filings, etc.); proposed parenting plan and/or relevant notes; your child’s school and extracurricular calendar; your calendar; relevant contact information of important people and places (emergency contact, babysitter, extracurricular locations, etc.) 

Utilize clear communication — be straightforward in discussions, do your best to contain emotions, listen carefully to respond appropriately, and take notes if needed to understand and stay on topic. 

Focus on collaborative solutions — working together, being understanding about special circumstances, and making compromises as necessary will prioritize the child’s well-being. 

In addition, prepare yourself physically and mentally for mediation. Try to rest and get a good night’s sleep. It is also important to enter mediation with the right mindset. The child’s best interests should be at the heart of all discussion points. While emotions due to personal disagreements with the other parent can come up during mediation, remember that you are working together for the health and well-being of your child.

With effective preparation, strategies, and legal guidance,  mediation can elicit a resolution that works for both parents and their child(ren). For information, please see our checklist and guide.

Legal Guidance in Mediation: Your Rights and Interests

When your family’s future is at stake, it is important to have an experienced attorney on your side. There is no substitute for having a professional advocating for your rights and interests during mediation.

The role of legal advice and representation in child custody mediation is multi-focal. A family law attorney:

Helps navigate the mediation process. This includes preparation and then facilitating progress and effective solutions for both short- and long-term issues throughout each step. 

Protects parental rights. Each parent has rights, whether they seek to obtain physical custody or not. Your attorney will ensure your rights and interests are central to the discussions during mediation. 

Advocates for fair and equitable outcomes. Your attorney leads as your advocate throughout each aspect of mediation. From timesharing to child support, family law attorneys understand the critical importance of fairness and equity in child custody cases and have the skills to facilitate these outcomes.  

Legal guidance has a vital role in mediation and can make a big difference in the outcome. 

Implementing and Adjusting Your Custody Agreement

After successful mediation, a written custody agreement is created. Once it is finalized, both parents need to sign the document. The finalized, signed agreement then has to be submitted to the court for the judge to examine and approve. 

When the judge approves the custody agreement, it is entered as a court order. In the legal system, a child custody court order is considered as any other court order. It is now legally binding and enforceable.

This custody agreement will stay in place as the child grows toward adulthood. However, it is not uncommon for circumstances to change. Perhaps a parent has a career change that alters their financial situation, decides to move out of state, or other changes in circumstances occur. When there are significant changes, a petition for a modification to the child custody agreement can be submitted to the court for review. 

The parents should discuss any desired alterations to the agreement. Family law attorneys can assist in developing and submitting the petition. With legal guidance, future changes can be made amicably and fairly while ensuring petitions are composed and submitted properly. 

Work With A Family Law Attorney

a family talking to a lawyer

Are you facing mediation regarding child custody? With the high stakes of custody cases, it is recommended to hire an attorney.

The attorneys at Golden Key Law Group understand the complexity of family law and the importance of having an experienced attorney to confidently navigate the mediation process, protect your parental rights, and secure the best possible outcome for your family. 

Contact us today to set up a consultation with a family law attorney. Our attorneys have represented hundreds of clients with family law actions throughout Pinellas and Hillsborough County and can help you, too.

We are dedicated, diligent, and determined to ensure your voice is heard.